A/N—just a little one shot that I thought up and thought was sort of cute and funny, I hope you all like, its F/M, though there really isn’t a relationship between the two main characters, anyway, let me know what you think, and thanks again for reading :P

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“Miranda I need caffeine. Be a doll and get me some, oh and two raspberry filled donuts”. Miranda Nichols let out a soft sigh, “Mr. Foxx, you know as well as I do that you aren’t aloud to have caffeine, how about some juice or milk instead”, she offered as she got up off their couch. Dark eyes met green. “I don’t like juice, or milk, or anything else that isn’t coffee or alcoholic”, Rhett snapped with annoyance and Miranda narrowed her green eyes.

 “I’m sorry Mr. Foxx, but Italia left specific instructions about what you could and couldn’t consume”, Miranda tried to keep her voice even and patient, even though Rhett Foxx was a hard person to stay patient around.

“My wife isn’t here is she? No, she is not, so that makes me boss and I demand that you get me what I want”, he hissed arrogantly. Miranda snorted, “Oh no it doesn’t you pampered prick, I work for Mrs. Foxx, not the asshole arm-candy she married”. She turned and strode into the kitchen of the big mansion; she could hear Rhett struggling too get off the couch.

“Come back here you b*tch, you don’t talk to me that way”, Rhett had managed to get himself off the couch and he had waddled into the kitchen. Miranda laughed at the spectacle he made, a twenty-two year old pretty boy, who was eight months pregnant. “This is my house and as long as you’re here then you’re going to abide by my rules”, he started again face flushed, “And don’t you dare laugh at me”.

Miranda ignored the last statement and held out a glass. “Here you are plain old fashioned water from the tap. Surely you’re not too good for water”, she thrust the glass into his hand, satisfied as he took hold of the glass. Rhett held the glass with a self-righteous smile, “Oh no, I like water, especially since it’s so good for doing exactly this”. He pitched the water into Miranda’s face and she gasp as it went into her eyes, up her nose, and dripped from her now sopping red curls.

Miranda bit down hard, her jaw tightly shut as she wiped the water from her face with her hand. She took the glass as Rhett held it out, that smug grin sill on his handsome face.

Two could play at that game she thought as she refilled the glass and turned slowly, smiling wickedly. “You really should drink something; we wouldn’t want you getting dehydrated now would we?” She in turn threw the water into Rhett’s face, smiling in satisfaction at the shocked squeak that escaped his lips.

“It’s not a nice feeling is it, you are spoiled and ungrateful and if you weren’t so far along into your pregnancy, I’d say f*** the money and leave”, she was angry but she refrained from yelling. She turned and grabbed a towel to clean up the floor. “Don’t move until I clean up the floor, I don’t want you falling”, she sighed heavily, as much as Rhett annoyed her; she did not want him to actually get hurt.

“M-Miranda”, a stuttered whimper was the response she received. “What Rhett?” she was still annoyed and she was not in the mood for any more of Rhett’s complaints. “Miranda!” this time the frantic tenor in Rhett’s voice caught Miranda’s attention, followed shortly by another splash of water hitting the floor.

“Oh no, no you didn’t, not now”, she exclaimed feeling panic beginning to rise. “It’s not my fault”, Rhett snapped then whimpered, “Ow! It hurts Miranda, make it stop”, he demanded and Miranda let out a nervous chuckle. “Sorry honey, but I can’t make it stop; your water just broke so that means it isn’t false labor”. She grabbed his arm, and pulled him forward, “Come on, we got to get you to a hospital”.

Miranda pulled him towards the door, but Rhett balked, “I’m not going out like this, I’m soaked and its gross”. Miranda rolled her eyes, “Fine, I’ll get you PJs to change into, but don’t you start whining when another contraction hits”, she hurried upstairs and grabbed the first set of sleep clothes that she came across, because she heard Rhett cry out.

When she got down stairs, Rhett was holding his belly and tears where streaming down his cheeks. “You jinxed me, you b*tch”, he whined and Miranda decided that the pain he was feeling was punishment enough and let the comment slide.

Instead, she yanked his wet tee over his head, muffling his protest and pulled the dry one over just as quick. The jeans followed next, replaced by a pair of drawstring black cottons pajama bottoms and sneakers. She helped him to the car and buckled him in, timing his contractions at twenty minutes apart while she was at it.

It took over half an hour to get to the hospital and Rhett’s contractions were twelve minutes apart, and his vivid complaints against the pain were starting to fray on Miranda’s nerves.

“It hurts, it hurts, it f***ing hurts”, he moaned as Miranda pulled the car up to the emergency entrance. “I know it hurts okay, I gave birth twice, my children are at my mothers and believe me when I say I know that it hurts”, she snapped, and then sighed. “I know it hurts Rhett, but the doctors will give you an epidural and then the pain will all go away”, she offered in promise and Rhett just nodded.

As the doctors got Rhett into a room, Miranda called Italia and only reached her voice mail, so she left a message and then went to find Rhett’s room.

Rhett was sitting in the bed, he was glancing uneasily at the stir-ups at the foot of the bed, and looked uncomfortable. “Uh, hi, can I come in?” She ask, and Rhett nodded looking hopeful, “Did you call Italia, is she coming?”

Miranda wasn’t sure why she suddenly felt so sorry the brunette. “Uh I couldn’t get a hold of her, I left a message on her voice mail”, there was no need to lie, even though the fallen expression Rhett wore made her wish she had.

“I should have known”, he said after a second, “She’s always so busy, I mean she left me with you after all and”, tears filled his eyes and Miranda felt her own heart aching and reached down taking his hand in her own. “I am here regardless, so you know it could be worse”.

Rhett gave a choked laugh, “Yeah you could have just taken off, I guess that Italia knew she made the right decision by hiring you, even if I do hate you”. Miranda grinned, “I hate you too, but I’ll be here until that baby comes, and Italia is here with you. Now did they give you anything for the pain?” A nod followed by a cry was her answer, “I’ll take that as it isn’t helping much”.

A nurse entered and fiddled with the IV before lifting the sheet around Rhett’s knees and smiling, “Looks like someone is about ready to deliver, I’m going to get the doctor. Are you staying”, she directed her last question at Miranda who had a deer in the headlights look. “Uh, I don’t know, I’m not family or…” she trailed off.

“She’s staying”, Rhett answered for her, and then turned his dark eyes to her, “You will right? I mean I hate you, but I don’t want to do this alone, I know you at least”. Miranda nodded, “With logic like that, how can I say no”.

Miranda had scrubbed in and was currently standing beside Rhett and trying to dodge his hand. “You’re supposed to hold my hand, now give it to me”, he demanded as a strong contraction took hold. “Your child’s ears will probably fall off”, she started, “but hell no, you’re still a guy and I am not risking you breaking my hand.” “You suck, and not in a good way, owwwwwwwwwwwwwww. Get it out, get it out, get it out NOW”, he yelled.

The doctor laughed, “Soon, Mr. Foxx, it’s time for you to start pushing”.

“Good, I’m gonna push it out so fast you’ll need a catchers mitt”, Rhett declared. Miranda snorted, “you shouldn’t talk that way of your and Italia’s child”, she scolded. “F*** Italia, she knocked me up and isn’t even here, I hate her worse then I hate you, ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh”.

“Push Rhett, push, push, push”, Miranda encouraged as Rhett bore down. He exhaled heavily and lay tiredly against the pillows. “I can’t anymore, its hurts, I’m tired, just cut it out”.

“Almost there sport”, the kindly doctor said and Rhett narrowed his eyes, “You said that an hour ago, so where is it”, he demanded, “Ow sh*t, f***, not again”. Miranda tried to contain her laughter but could not, but when she looked down her eyes widened, “Oh Rhett I see the head, the baby is almost here, just push okay, just a little more”.

Rhett took a breath and pushed hard, he dropped boneless against the bed as he felt the baby slide from him and the squalling of the newborn filled the air.

“It’s a girl”, the doctor announced and Miranda laughed again, this time in joy and she squeezed Rhett’s hand as she looked down into his tired smiling eyes. “You did it Rhett, have a little girl, a baby girl”. Rhett smiled tiredly, “Awesome. I want to hold her now”, he said and the nurse placed the baby wrapped in a pink blanket into his arms.

“She’s gorgeous”, Miranda whispered in awe, as she reached a finger to caress a tiny cheek. “You did good, Italia is going to be so happy”.

“Yeah”, Rhett agreed then gave a Miranda a genuine smile, “You want to hold her”. Miranda nodded and took the infant into her own arms, “Hello, oh you’re such a good baby, you cry less then your daddy”, she cooed ignoring Rhett’s protest of “Hey”, the baby just blinked at her with big dark eyes and wrapped a tiny fist around her finger. “If you’re gonna be like that the give her back to me”, Rhett yawned, but Miranda gave the baby to a nurse.

“You should sleep asshole, you’re exhausted”. Rhett nodded, “alright b*tch I will”, he shut his eyes and Miranda started for the door to try and reach Italia again. “Miranda”, she stopped and turned, “Thanks again, you’re not so bad and I’m really glad you were with me”, Rhett said tiredly and Miranda smiled. “Anytime Rhett, you’re not so bad yourself.”

a/n---and there it is, I hope you enjoyed, and if not thanks for reading anyway XP